A soon-to-be mom has set Reddit ablaze after refusing her husband’s plea to name their daughter after his late wife and baby, who tragically died in childbirth eight years ago.
The original poster, 34, explained she initially let her husband choose the baby’s middle name — but quickly realized the name he picked belonged to his late spouse.
“I didn’t disagree in front of my stepdaughter as I didn’t want to hurt her feelings,” she wrote this week in the infamous AITA forum.
When the couple tried to add a second middle name — the name of his late child — tensions boiled over.
The woman left the house and stayed with her sister for a week, telling her husband, “I don’t want my kid to have the same name as the woman I’m always compared to.”
Her husband reportedly pushed back, insisting, “The names are important to me and I really want a part of them still in my life.”
The OP added that while she let her husband pick the first name, she drew the line at the middle names.
“I didn’t care and I didn’t want my kid to have those names,” she wrote, recounting how a discussion about the baby shower turned into a week-long estrangement at her sister’s house.
She told Redditors that she didn’t want her daughter constantly compared to a woman she could never replace.
The debate in the thread raged, with commenters overwhelmingly backing the pregnant poster. “NTA. Imagine when your child gets older and they realise they were named after her dad’s late child and partner. They’ll feel like they were just a replacement,” one wrote.
Another added, “NTA — it’s such an unhealthy take seriously. This child has nothing to do with his late wife and kid. It’s a hill I’d be ready to die on.”
Several users called out the husband for projecting his grief onto the newborn, leaving the mother feeling like a permanent “footnote” in his life.
“Absolutely NTA. This is your baby girl together, not a replacement for the wife and daughter who unfortunately died,” one Redditor wrote.
As previously reported by The Post, one bride-to-be sparked a similar Reddit debate earlier this spring by planning to wear her late husband’s wedding ring on a chain during her upcoming wedding.
Her fiancé admitted in his AITA post that he’d supported her through grief but struggled with the tribute, noting she “still visits his grave on his birthday, and she keeps a box of his things in our closet.”
One commenter in the thread bluntly weighed in: “Your wedding is inherently… about your relationship together and her late husband shouldn’t be a part of it.”
As the internet continues to weigh in on how much is too much when it comes to the ghosts of past loves, the verdict is clear: some memories belong in the heart, not on a birth certificate — or a wedding day.
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